SCATTERED MEMORIES

“She’s coming around.” A voice came out of the darkness. And then there were bright lights surrounding Lori. Someone was holding her down.
“Let go of me.” She struggled against the hold while squeezing her eyes closed. Then she couldn’t fight as a warm sensation trickled through her veins. “Don’t…” Was the last word to escape her parched lips before she fell once again into oblivion.

Slowly Lori opened her eyes and allowed them to adjust to the warm hues of green surrounding her. She was in a hospital bed with an IV pole attached right above her. All was quiet and the blinds allowed only a sliver of sunlight to gain entrance. “Good morning.” A matronly nurse in a starched white uniform smiled. “You’ve had a nice nap.” Her blue eyes had crinkles in the corners.
“Where am I?” Lori croaked.
“You’re at County Medical. And you’ve been here about a week.”
“A week.” Lori tried to sit up but the pain in her head had her back down on the pillows.
“Dr. Andrews will answer all of your questions. You need to remain calm.”
She rocked on her heels crossing her arms against her ample bosom. “My name is Peg and I’m your nurse.”
“I can’t remember…”
“It will come back. In bits and pieces but for now all you need to do is lie still and I will summon the doctor for you.”
Lori took a deep breath. She was too tired to argue. Too tired to get out of bed. Too tired to care. “How is our patient today?” A young doctor entered the room carrying a clipboard. “Good morning.” He smiled down at her with warm brown eyes. “I am Dr. Andrews.”
“What happened?”
“You don’t remember?”
“No.”
“You were in an accident.” He paused. “Your husband will be so happy to…”
Husband! “I’m not married.”
“What do you remember?” He pulled up a chair and took a seat beside the bed. “Peg, why don’t you get Mrs. Davis some breakfast?”
“I remember shopping with my mother.”
“Uh huh… What else?”
“We were shopping for dresses for my brother’s wedding…”
“Who’s your date for your brother’s wedding?”
Lori took a deep breath and rubbed her head. Think! Think! Her mind screamed. “I’m not sure…”
“That’s all right Mrs. Davis.”
“Don’t call me that.”
“What would you like for me to call you?”
“Lori.”
“Okay Lori.” He placed the clipboard into his lap after scribbling a few notes. “Tell me about your family.”
“Has my mother been here?”
Dr. Andrews cleared his throat. “Well?” She demanded.
“Your husband is the only one who has been here.”
“And I told you that I’m not married.” Lori forced through clenched teeth. “I am so out of here.” She threw the covers back angrily but the sight that greeted her was that of disbelief. Her once slim beautiful legs were now bruised, swollen, and ugly. Her breath caught. “Oh God.” Fear swept through her entire body. “What… I don’t understand… I can’t remember… Please…”
“Your body is going to need time to heal.” Dr. Andrews replaced the white cotton blanket which had covered her frail but marred body. “As will your mind need time to remember. And you will.”
“Can you contact my mother?”
“No.” Dr. Andrews gained his full six feet his eyes softening still. “Your mother passed away five years ago.”

Louis Davis rubbed his eyes wearily. He’d hardly slept in the last week, ever since Lori’s accident. “Daddy…” Pamela slapped the brush down onto the table with a thwack. “Brush my hair like Mommy does.”
“Please.” Louis corrected his daughter with a smile.
“Please.” She returned a smile.
“I’ll try my best.” Louis sat his five year old daughter at the table and gently brushed her long dark curls.
“Mommy does it bestest.”
“Better.”
“When can I see Mommy?”
He got down on his haunches beside her. “Mommy had an accident Pumpkin.”
“I miss her.”
“Me too.” Louis gave his daughter a quick hug. “Let’s get ready for school.”
“I want to see Mommy first.” Her little chin quivered. It was remarkable how much his daughter favored his looks and at this point it was a good thing. Damnit Lori! How could you have been so damned careless!
Just then the doorbell rang, cutting into the rest of his thoughts. “That must be Melissa.” Melissa was Pamela’s babysitter and had been since she had been an infant.
“I want to see Mommy.”
“I will ask the doctor okay?”
“Kay.” She scooted down from the table and headed for the other room where Melissa had quietly let herself in.

Lori stared out the window hardly touching her breakfast. Her mother had passed away five years ago! How did one lose five years of their life without one flicker of a thought? Dr. Andrews came back after completing rounds. “I need to know what happened to me.” Lori stated simply. “All the facts. I don’t even know who my husband is…”
“Your husband is Louis Davis. He owns…”
“Davis Automotive.”
Dr. Andrews perked up. “Everyone knows that.” Lori added as an after thought. I remember Kevin Davis. I went to school with him. But I don’t remember Louis…”
“Your brother went to school with Louis.” He stated simply. “These things take time. The important thing is that you are recovering. What is the last thing you can actually remember?”
“I remember going shopping. My mom had her fitting…” She scratched her head absently. “What happened to the last five years?” Her voice broke. “My husband… Has he come to see me?”
“Every day.”
“My brother is overseas. Military.”
“Did you want to see Louis today?”
Her breath caught in her throat. How could she admit to this doctor, a stranger, that she was scared to death of seeing this man she had no recollection of? Maybe he was hoping it would jog her memory. “Maybe a nice warm shower and you can make yourself pretty for your visit.”
Lori swept her long blonde hair to the side as Peg came through the door with a manila folder which she handed to the doctor. “Thanks.” He opened the file to the very first page. “I was hoping you can help Lori take a shower so that she can have a visit with her husband.”
“Of course.”
Dr. Andrews spread out a couple of photos on the tray before her. There was a photo of her parents, both deceased. There was a wedding picture of her brother Johnny and his lovely wife Camille. Then there was a photo of Lori dancing with a good looking man. He fit the bill of tall dark and handsome. What a cliché. “Do you know this man?”
“No.”
He took the picture back and placed two more in its place. “How about these?”
“This is Kevin.” She pushed it towards the doctor. “I don’t know the other.”
“You’re right about Kevin. This is Josh, another brother.” He withdrew another photo from the file. “This is Louis.” He handed her back the first picture he had showed her.
“I don’t remember.” Her breath caught and her bottom lip trembled with emotion. “I married this man five years ago…”
“Seven.”
“Seven…” She echoed
“You’re mom passed away five years ago.”
The man, Louis Davis, was drop dead gorgeous. Why would he have wanted to marry her? “I have a marriage certificate here somewhere.”

Louis cleared his schedule with Melissa. He would be spending the day at the hospital. Lori had awakened and he needed to be there. Dr. Andrews said something about her memory lapsing although he hadn’t gone into detail. All he wanted was to make sure that Lori was all right and would be ready to come home to them. “Not much to ask for.” He sneered with contempt as he pulled his Lexis into a parking spot in the visitor parking lot.

Lori sat in the chair as Peg helped her shower. She couldn’t remember ever feeling so alone. Her legs weren’t working and her mind wasn’t working either. She enjoyed feeling the water on her face and the soap bubbles racing down her back. She washed her own hair and lathered her body with the bar of soap that Peg had supplied.
Thank goodness for some privacy. While Peg turned her back Lori gripped the chair and slowly pulled herself up. The pain in her legs was great but at least she could feel it. “What are you doing?” Peg pushed her back down into the chair.
“I just wanted to see if I could stand…”
“You’ll be walking around in no time. I thought Dr. Andrews explained your injuries.”
“I was worried about not remembering…”
“It’s okay Sweetie. You’re young. You’ll make a complete recovery.”
How could she explain what she was feeling? She was going to see her husband today. A husband she knew nothing about. “Let’s get you into something pretty.” She placed a cotton blanket around Lori’s petite form as she was shivering with cold. “Your husband brought so many pretty things I am sure there is something here that you’ll like.”
Once Lori was dressed in a pretty purple nightgown she sat by the window. It was a sunny day with a bright blue sky. After brushing her hair she closed her eyes and enjoyed the warmth on her face.
Scattered pictures danced before her mind’s eye. Louis Davis. She had married well. Wearily she sighed as she heard the door open. Please let me remember something. Anything. Please. “Hello Lori.”
His voice was as smooth as melting butterscotch. “Sweetheart.”
She opened her eyes as he knelt down beside her chair. “I’m sorry.” She whispered.
“It’s all right.” He placed a gentle hand to her cheek. “I’ve been so worried.”
Lori found herself drowning in those deep brown eyes. “You’ve got some color.” He smiled and her heart melted. It was easy to see what had attracted her to this man.
The moment their lips touched it was somehow familiar. Scattered memories raced across her mind in a whirlwind. She remembered being held in this man’s arms. Dancing with him. Laughing with him. And just as she had remembered everything good she suddenly remembered the betrayal.
Lori had come across some personal items from the closed adoption. She also happened upon Pamela’s birth certificate which should have been sealed with the adoption. Seeing Louis’ name on the birth certificate had taken her aback but that had been nothing compared to seeing Melissa’s name entered as Pamela’s biological mother. That was when she had realized that their marriage had been built on lies. The entire truth had sent her over the edge. Before leaving the house she had confronted him with the proof.

“I’m sorry Lori. Yes, I should have told you the truth. We both wanted a baby. You couldn’t get pregnant…”
“So, this is my fault…”
“Of course not…”
“You didn’t trust me enough…”
“Yeah right.” Louis returned sarcastically. “And you would have continued to raise Pammy…”
“Yes damnit, I would have. I love Pammy.” She held up a hand as he moved closer. “Not this time Louis. You can’t make this better with a couple of kisses and sweet words.” Lori stood her ground.
“You’re leaving us.”
“I need some time to think.” And with that said she stormed out.

Tears ran down her cheeks as Louis granted her space. “Pammy misses her mommy.”
“I’m not her mommy.”
“Yes, you are. You always have been.”
“I need more than that.”
“Whatever you want Lori.”
“I want honesty.”
“The truth hurts.”
“Lies hurt more.”
“I love you.”
“Prove it.” Lori paused. “We need to go into counseling.”
“Therapy?”
“Take it or leave it.”
“We can try therapy.” He took her hand gently within his own. “I love you Lori and I love all that we have built together.”
“It’s going to be hard work.”
“We’re worth it.”
“Yes we are.” Lori kissed her husband.