From One Mother to Another…

Today I woke up missing my mother more than usual. There were so many things we hadn’t talked about when she had been alive. Things we probably should have talked about. I had, however, made sure that she hadn’t blamed herself for my foolish mistakes of the past. That is the thing with mistakes. I think Billy Joel said it best. They are truly the only things that we can call our own. Isn’t that the truth?
My relationship with my daughter is pretty good. At least I think it is. We can talk about many things. Even though there are plenty of those occasions when she rolls her eyes when I am getting too personal. “Hey, I’m your mother. It gives me the right to be a royal pain in your butt. I tell you these things, why?”
“Because you love me.” By now, her eyes are still rolling but there is the hint of a smile. As long as she knows that is why I am being so persistent. It is important to me that she knows.
I am not going to be around forever. I need to know that she, as well as my boys, can take care of themselves. Only then, will my job as a mother be complete. My boys have taken on the hard-headed mentality. That’s all right. We’ve all been there. As long as they know that I love them and want the very best for them that life has to offer.
No one understands better than me that you can love someone and not be able to live with them. That was the type of relationship I shared with my mother. I could not live with her but that did not mean I didn’t love her. I found I had a better relationship with her when I didn’t live with her.
I always admired my mom; I thought she had to be one of the strongest women I had ever known. She had single-handedly raised three girls who had turned into some pretty successful women, if I do say so myself. My grandmother had lived with us as well but it had been my mom who ran the house. She raised us to be the best that we could be. And for the time that I had deviated from the plan, God had been watching over me. I thank God that I finally came to my senses, came back into the fold, and had been able to spend some time with my mom before she had unexpectedly passed away three years later.
There are some things I don’t understand. Some things I may never understand. And that’s quite all right. I’m still standing here, unwavering, standing on the promises of God. I’ve come to accept that God’s plan for my life is so much better than anything I can ever hope to achieve. So I wait and I pray to God with an unconditional love that only one mother to another can ever understand.

PawPrints

Everyone who knows me knows the way I feel about my Ratties. Chase and Chelsea are my two babies. I love them with all my heart, much more than I ever thought that I could love another human being; the fact that they are dogs has no bearing on that love. There are people who have no idea what they are missing and that is too bad. A dog loves unconditionally. There are people that can take lessons in that particular department.
When I say that there are absolutely no conditions I mean none. All they ask for is food, water, some attention, and our love in return. They need to be cared for and in return they give us companionship and unconditional love. A dog does not know how to hold a grudge. He does not care if you are not pretty. He doesn't care if you gained a few pounds over the holidays and haven't even started working out. A nice healthy dinner, a scratch behind the ears, and a nice walk will suffice.
Chase is eight and Chelsea is six. Although they are both the same breed, Rat Terriers, they are as different as night and day. Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus. Maybe the same holds true for dogs as well.
Everyone who knows us also knows what we have been through with Chase’s health. I can only thank God that we have come through and now can see that light at the end of the tunnel. I haven’t been able to put what we had gone through in words because it had been such a nightmare from the very beginning. He’d gone through major surgery and if it’s one thing I have learned about Chase – He is a fighter. You can’t keep a good dog down. He has proven this over and over again, too many times if you ask me. That hospital stay had been hard on all of us. I was amazed at how caring the staff was at the Animal Emergency & Referral Associates located in Fairfield, New Jersey. They had been kind through my tears and concern for my beloved Chase. And it was a relief to feel that they cared and that Chase wasn’t just a meal ticket for someone. Unfortunately they got to know him a little too well but through it all they were there whenever and however many times I called. That was a comfort. Even the doctors got to know Chase and his many quips while he was there. And I was comforted to know that Chase was getting the best care possible. I knew that in my heart.
If I hear “It’s just a dog,” one more time I think I might scream. Both Chase and Chelsea rate as my children. And no one knows this better than a dog lover. I can tell you beyond the shadow of a doubt that Tom and I have such a special bond with our pups that cannot me explained. Our love supersedes unconditional love if that is possible. With God on our side we have remained positive as we had weathered some pretty tough waters in the last four months. Chase and Chelsea have left their paw prints all over my clothes, my furniture, but more than that, they left their paw prints all over my heart.