Rest in Peace - Chase (Gizzie) Bonaldi

R.I.P.

Chase (Gizzie) Bonaldi

02-21-2001 to 12-10-2019

There’s a heaviness in our home and it is so quiet.  Chase (Gizzie) Bonaldi has left a hole in our hearts that will never be replaced.  He was a million in one pup.  Everyone who has ever had the pleasure of meeting him automatically fell in love with him.  There was something about him.  And that doesn’t even include his antics.

Chase came through odds that were unbelievable – but then again there were so many prayers sent up when he had been really ill back in 2009.  The doctors weren’t optimistic with his prognosis but Tom and I did not waver.  We stood on the promises of God and in time Chase came through.  Some of the doctors had even been shocked.

Chase had what I had called “Chaseanality”.  He was a loving pup and wanted to be with us as much as possible.  He had truly been a lap dog.  We loved him and he knew it.  In turn he gave us unconditional love.

Last night had been a long night.  There was too much room in the bed.  I can’t even explain how I feel besides empty.  I miss that little guy more than words can express.  I miss that special look, I miss carrying him around like a football, I especially miss kissing that little furry face – and having those kisses returned ten-fold.

My heart aches as I know we have to look for a new normal.  Right now nothing feels normal.  Even Chelsea is feeling it. 

Thank you for the outpouring of love.  We really appreciate it.

Faith

My writing has really been struggling this year.  Talk about a hiatus - it's been too long really.  I think I fell into a depression without realizing what was happening.  It started when I had gained close to twenty pounds within a couple of months.  Next came the many doctor visits for different things.  Until finally the discovery of the C-word and then the subsequent surgery.  
My family and friends pulled together to help me get through it.  Of course it hadn't helped that I had just started working again and didn't have time to take off.  I know what you're thinking so I won't even go there.  I was worried about many different things and not only work.
Needless to say I was back to work in a week.  It wasn't enough time but I pulled it off.  I wish I could say that the surgery had fixed everything.  Of course it fixed the biggest problem - it got rid of the cancer.  Thank you Jesus.  
It's not quite a year that I am now cancer free, and believe me, I thank God every day for that.  Yet, I don't feel any better.  I am still getting monitored, they are testing that my medication is adjusted accordingly yet I am still sluggish.  Throw menopause into that mix and you have some combination.  I go to bed tired and I wake up more tired than when I went to sleep.  It honestly doesn't make any sense.  I am tired of being tired.
The weight still hasn't come off.  Not that I am trying much mind you.  I don't have it in me to exercise so I can't even go there.  I am lucky if I can make it to eight before contemplating the bed.  Not fun.    
I went on vacation with two of my girlfriends and had to push myself each morning just to get out of bed.  Sure, we had a blast, crossed two things off of my bucket list, (another blog) and it was a fantastic time.  It would have been better if I had been thirty pounds lighter and not so tired. 
So now what?  Find another doctor.  Keep looking for what?  I'm really not sure at this point.
Exhaustion is a hard battle to fight.  Especially when you do not know exactly what you are fighting.  It's been ongoing and uphill all the way.  So, I put it in God's hands and trust that He will pull me through.  And He will.  He always does.  All I need to do is to continue to have faith.  

2019 - The Year of the Bucket List

I have the book.  I have the list tucked inside my mind.  Yet I hesitate...  Why?  The moment it goes down on paper is the moment it becomes REAL!  It's there.  It's front and center.  You can't take it back.  Not that I would want to...  The only thing is that if I do not achieve the goal wouldn't that mean failure?
At first I thought so.  My Bucket List is not so big but to me it's a real tall order.  I mean, I am reaching.  I guess I should start with the things I had already accomplished on my Bucket List.  I traveled on a plane by myself.  That might not mean much to some people but to me that was major.  I knew I had to do it for myself.  And that is as good a reason as any. 
So - there's one for the book...  

Now - I have how many more pages to go...  I have accomplished more than I actually give myself credit for.  I have quite a few goals that I still need to achieve.  With a book like this...  Well - that's half the battle!

Cover Reveal

So much going on.  Not enough time to do the things we want to do.  I've heard this a million times and have felt it a million more.  How the writer in me does not explode I have no idea.  I have all of these stories running around in my head - and the need to get them down on paper overwhelms me.  That is why I have snippets all over the place.
I finally put The End to Coming Home for Christmas...  It felt like forever but that also has a lot to do with timing.  I did not want to change the title.  I wanted a feel good Christmas story with that promise of a second chance.  If you love someone I believe they deserve a second chance.

And here it is...   Cover Reveal:

Tentative Publishing date:  October 2018

The Many Facets of Love

When I think of love I think of the many facets of love.  There is a love between a husband and a wife; a love between siblings; a love between a mother and a child.  All of these types of love are different yet they are unconditional.
The love of a husband and wife is the love that is always changing.  It evolves as does time.  What once began as a fairy tale love story soon becomes deeper and stronger as time steadily moves on.

The love between siblings is a strong bond as they share their parents.  They are first friends as well as first fighters.  They can love one minute and hate each other the next.  Yet they will stand up for each other no matter what the circumstance.  Whether they stay close or move away - whether they speak every day or every so often - they will always share that sibling love.

Then there is the love between a mother and a child.  That love is a special bond that no one can break.  A love that can sometimes be trying as a child begins to assert themselves.  That usually comes with a strong dose of tough love.  (Tough Love - a post for another day.)

 

The Power of an Unwavering Prayer

For two long years I had questions of a personal nature.  I couldn't understand what was going on and why.  I have never questioned God.  I had questioned myself but never God.  I had faith and knew that while I was only able to see a piece of the puzzle that God could see the entire puzzle.  
For two years I felt as though I was in a transitional phase in my life while I was in a constant state of flux.  But while I was in this state of flux there were so many great things happening all around me and some not so great!
Two grandbabies were born into our family just three months apart.  Aria Sandra, my little namesake, and Antonio Manuel, my little miracle.  Aria was born in Florida where my son and his family moved, two years ago.  I got to finally meet her when she was almost a year old.  We had a full house at Christmas Time!  (Aria Sandra)

Before Antonio was born we learned that my daughter had thyroid cancer.  Our family stood on the word of God, especially His promises.  I can't even begin to imagine how it was for my daughter.  That C word can strike fear into the strongest of people but she was more worried about her unborn child then she was concerned for herself.  She was strong! 

She followed all of the Dr.'s orders without hesitation.  They would give her six weeks from the birth before they would do surgery. 

(Antonio Manuel)

We formulated a plan of action covering the birth of Antonio to the surgery to the subsequent treatment after the surgery.  Since she would be treated and would be radioactive so to speak - Antonio had to be removed from the house for 2 to 3 weeks until she was given the all clear from the doctor.  There was no question about it - Antonio would come and stay with us and we would FaceTime so she could speak to him.

There was a lot involved to have this plan come to fruition but we pulled together as a family.  There were no other options - this is when I believe I really began to understand, at least a little bit, of how God makes things work together for our good.  All those times that I prayed.  I prayed for strength, for healing, and a lot of other things that couldn't be put into words.  That too is when I realized The Power of an Unwavering Prayer!

All About the Bass

A little more than I want to be - but hey - why deny the facts?  I am bringing booty back - front and center...https://youtu.be/7PCkvCPvDXk